I don't know if I've ever been more overwhelmed. This must be some kind of breaking point.
What feels the worst is that the car accident was most likely my fault.
Yes, the other driver was going too fast and talking on her cell phone, but I made a left-hand turn, and I thought I had enough time.
If I had just waited another 10 seconds, everything would have been fine.
The whole thing probably happened because I am already stressed out of my mind.
The garage where my car was towed estimates that it will cost $2,295.00 to fix it (he said he would do it for $2,076.00 if I could pay all at once).
If I could have afforded to pay for collision insurance, this wouldn't be a very big problem, but the way it is, I could only afford liability insurance.
If I try to sell the car the way it is, I might get $500 for it.
If it were in "good" condition, the blue-book value is $4,400.00
Sadly, I still owe the bank $2,151.00 from when I bought the car, last year.
I made payments on that every other week, but it just doesn't seem to go down.
I have a line of credit at my other credit union that is nearly maxed out, and another line of credit that I am supposed to only use for school-related expenses (the interest rate is slightly lower).
I have an $800.00 balance on my credit card.
I am working about 12 hours this week.
I am desperately trying to find more work, or different work, for the summer, but it seems as though the more desperate I am, the fewer connections I make.
I will take ANYTHING, ANY job that will let me work steady, regular hours. Even if I had to work for less that $10.00 an hour, it would be worth it to know that I could work a definite number of hours each week. The flexibility of under-employment has lost all its charm.
My mom says she wants to give me $100 a month, but I feel so guilty for putting her in that position, I would rather starve.
I want anything she can spare to go to my sisters and brother first.
I don't know what I'm going to do.
4 comments:
lemme put my thinking cap on... i have been in your position and other stressful, seemingly hopeless tangly ones like it more times than i care to mention and maybe there's a lesson i've learned that can help you.
do something realllllly caring for yourself first, though. the stress is the first barrier that keeps the solutions out of sight.
hugs!
It's not the end of the world if you have to put the repairs on your credit card. I was taught that credit cards are for unforeseen emergencies. Will it be teh suck to pay it off? Probably. Do your research and try to find a card with a good rate, or one that you can do a 0% balance transfer for 6 months or whatever to. That will give you some leeway to start paying it off. Call your bank, tell them what up and see if you can renegotiate your loan, at least for a little while. The worst they can do is say no.
You don't have to sell your body to the night.
Jesse: I nixed that option early, based mostly on its inefficiency.
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